My story.. Prolouge

All of my life, I have had many crushes. They came, and they went, in just a few months. My latest crush, however, has lasted 3 years.
His name is Shane Haze. He has short brown hair, and his eyes are the most brilliant blue. He will wear glasses when he needs to, which is not very often. He is 5’10, which is 7 inches taller then me.
The first time I met him was in my school’s newspaper making committee. He was wearing a red shirt, and jeans. He had his green messenger bag slung over his shoulder, and he was assigned to be my ‘study buddy’.
I, of course, was really shy around him. I noticed that he usually kept to himself, although he would occasionally start a conversation with me. Over time, we became friends, and over time, I realized what it was I really loved about him.
It was his smile. His real smile, not the one he gives when he is upset. It can make me happy when I am sad, and usually is the highlight of my day.
Over the years, I have also noticed that is usually very cheerful. He is happy even when life throws horrible things at him. “When life gives you 100 reasons to cry, show life 1,000 reasons to smile” always make me think of Shane.
I always say that I have a crush on him, but Sasha Hale, one of my good friends, strongly disagrees with that statement. She says I am infatuated with him. To be infatuated with someone means to be so obsessed with that person, that you can’t make good decisions. My argument with that is, if I am infatuated with Shane, then, is she head-over-heels for Alex?
Alex is Sasha’s crush, at the moment. My crush on Shane is like a flea compared to Sasha’s crush on Alex. She never pays attention to anyone, and she usually falls down the stairs when she is thinking about him. Whenever she sees something brown, she swoons, and murmurs “It’s the color of Alex’s eyes!”
You can clearly see, by the statement above, that she has a crush on him. He crush, however, is different than mine. She is currently going out with her crush.
I don’t think I could ever go out with my crush. The problem is Paula. Paula Selman is going out with Fred Thompson, but she likes Shane. Shane likes Paula, and me, but he went out with Paula, twice, and they broke up. So, to put it in a nutshell, Shane likes Paula, who is going out with Fred. Shane also likes me, and I like Shane.
Well, I guess it is time to go to school, too-da-loo!
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I am currently in love. Please leave a message after the beep and I will get back to you.

BEEP!

Pretty good. But the last sentence sounds a bit sudden after all of the main character's thoughts about crushes.

I agree with Whimsical-Juppie.

Seeing as I have authored many stories I can say it's best not to rush an ending. It seems like it could have a nice plot but you need to bring your close on a little more slowly. And at the beginning she seems to jump topics very quickly, one minute she is introducing herself and the next she is talking about crushes. I'd suggest slowing it down a little, maybe adding a little more to her personality besides saying that she is shy.
Other than that I can see you have a good plot going. Keep up the good work!
-Serenity